To: God (2)

God, I feel like crying...
No more words that rhyme...
I can't even think straight...
Suddenly I feel like everything is crumbling around me...
I'm worried...I'm worried bout the camp
I'm worried bout what I'm doing..
I'm not leading it properly...
There's so many things not done...
I'm worried bout my results...
I don't know what will happen..
I'm frustrated Lord!!!!!!!!
I'm so frustrated and angry with myself!!!
I don't know what I'm doing..
I hate my slack-ness...
My irresponsibility that led to so many problems...
With the committee...
With the camp preparations...
With so many things...
Like CF as well...
I feel like crying...But my eyes are dry...
It's as though the distance from my heart to my eyes is so far...
That by the time the pain gets there its simmered down to the point where my eyes don't want to tear anymore...
God I'm really tired....And I haven't even done anything worth being tired about...
My responsibilities are in a mess now...
I have to drag myself about to get things done...
I feel so useless and helpless Lord...
I don't even know why I'm feeling this way...
I feel like a fool...
And I'm sorry if I disappointed You in this...
Sorry...I'm so sorry...I want to do better...
I really do....