2010...I know You are with me

Its the first day of year 2010...and despite the celebrations I find myself in deep trouble....today has been a testament to the power of God...that He will stop at nothing to bring righteousness and justice....it also serves as a powerful reminder....that God is watching...and He knows...particularly since its the first day of the year...it tells me that God will not let me be when He knows I'm wrong...and that His presence is still strongly here even in the new year...while I'm saddened by what happened...it gives me comfort that He still cares...enough to discipline me

My parents are not at home...and mischief kicked in....I wasn't supposed to be out of the house after 11...but I was....I decided to go out with friends at 9+...and since my parents weren't home I THOUGHT I could come home late.....so I went to a cybercafe....and enjoyed myself.....without apparent thought for God and my parents...and I lost my wallet....that includes my license, IC, ATM card, cash(thank God its not more than RM10), and my dad's credit card. I believe it is no mere coincidence that I lost it...rather divine will that I should not get away with my wrong doings...as a result I had to call my parents and inform them to call the bank, and go to the police station to lodge a report as well as call my bank to cancel my ATM card...also I covered up my story so my parents would not know that I was out late....a deed I deeply regret doing even as I'm typing this entry....

And my God is awesome...no He didn't pull off a last minute miracle and I found my wallet....neither did He reverse time backwards for me....I was and am convicted to reveal the truth to my parents when they get back...and I know full well what is in store for me...and I can only blame myself for it...I accept that responsibility..because I know that is what God wants of me...and He is awesome...why...because the moment I got online and read my friend's blog these words spoke out in her entry....

Lessons learned in 2009:

my God cares even the slightest details.

my God gives courage to the weak.

my God sustains.

my God provides & is always there when He is called.

my God keeps His promises.

my God listens.

my God speaks.

my God forgives.

my God chooses the weak to accomplish His BIG plans.

my God loves me even when I push Him aside.

my God’s plans are the best & they are final.

my God knows

When I read the words in bold I almost broke out in tears....I praise Him...for He is wonderful...after the discipline He sent my way...not letting me get away with sin...He reminds me that He forgives...He forgives....He forgives..and He knows...He knows and He will not let it go easily because He loves me..and He loves me even when I push Him aside...even when I choose to disobey my parents..to go against Him....to push Him aside and choose to enjoy myself in the wrong way.....He loves me...He loves me....I cannot begin to explain how I feel right now....tearing up as I type...feeling sorry for what I did....feeling afraid when I finally confess to my parents...and yet feeling so loved by my God above that He took the trouble to show me I was wrong and to not let me get away with it...because He cares for me...He cares for me....

I thank you Lord...there's nothing else I can say...I'm sorry...for going against You Jesus, and for disobeying my parents...I thank you for I know...that the year 2010 will be a wonderful year...because You cared....You cared enough to discipline me....May folly no longer follow me...May this year be a year in which I will bring honour and glory to Your name...I only pray that You will make me worthy of bringing honour to You.