The Dangers of Desire

Sometimes I wonder, what is it about desire that makes people cringe? Everyone has their desires, their deep-seated heart longings, yet we frown on those who pursue their desire with reckless abandon, or upon those who voice them out. Don't get me wrong, I'm not condoning the actions of those who go to extreme ends to satisfy their desire, indeed some of the world's most evil deeds were carried out simply because an individual decided to pursue his desire at all costs. Desires can be a dangerous thing if pursued recklessly, or when one pursues a reckless desire. But what of the everyday desires of the ordinary people? Of the heart?

Most of the time, to mention a desire would draw comments and expressions of disapproval, or in the case of children, a wry smile and a shake of the head, in condescension of the naivete of the child. Yet deep down in us, we all have our hidden desires which we long to see fulfilled, accomplished, pursued.

When I was a child I was brought up by my parents with one of life's biggest lessons drilled into my head, that I can't have everything I want in life, that the cookie in that jar is not mine to have, and I should stop whining or griping about it. I agree wholeheartedly with my parent's teaching, that you can't have all that you want in life. Sometimes the jar in the cookie is not yours, and you just have to accept that.

But that should never come in the way of pursuing it. The cookie in the jar may never be yours then, but you will grow up one day, and have the ability to get that cookie. By then, most people have become so accustomed to the idea of not getting what they want, that they don't get what they want, even if they can.

One of the greatest losses in life is the lacking of desire, or of giving it up before even pursuing it.

One of the truth about desires is simple, yet contradictory. Something seems more desirable when we cannot have it, and once you have it, all its seemingly magical qualities are gone, and the item loses its luster. A thing seems the most desirable when we pursue it. Yet once again, it is the journey that seems to bring meaning, and the possession of the object of desire falls secondary. Some people spend their whole lives desiring something, yet die without ever achieving it. While some see it as a waste, I see it as a life full of meaning, that they died having tried to achieve what they wanted.

Unfortunately, in our attempt to keep society in order, and to make sure the economic machine that is life runs smoothly, we are told to never pursue what we want, because if everybody did what they truly wanted to do, the world would be in chaos, and anarchy and mayhem would follow. In the end, we wind up stuck in a world where we work for money to buy the things and follow the paths we want, but spend it instead on things and paths we never wanted.

As is the case with everything human, there is a dark side to every construct, and desires are no different. The dangers of desire are clear; it can lead a man down a path of insanity. There is a term in Islam called the Zahir, which basically means something that enraptures the heart and mind of a man that he is compelled to pursue it, to go after it. It becomes his obsession, his life. This is when desires become dangerous, when we become so lost in our desires that we lose sight of who we are, or where we are headed.

Yet the irony of it all is that desires are precisely the things that give us direction. Whether a desire for material things, or a desire for the immaterial (God, heaven, a relationship), it all compels us to move in a direction.

Desires are unavoidable, and compels us as humans to move, to feel, to be alive. A life without desires would not be a life without worries or lacking, but a life void of meaning, life, love.

Yes, desires are dangerous. They can drive a man to insanity, they can ruin the whole functioning mechanic that is life.

Yet, desires are important. And one should never live without chasing one's desires because of fear, fear of failure, fear of never obtaining our desire, or the fear that, having achieved the object of our desire, to find that it was never as great as we thought it would be. After all, it is the journey that matters, the longing and compelling of desire that pulls us along its path to its goal. That gives us life, that gives us meaning.

Embrace the everyday desires of the heart. Pursue it, live it.

*I understand that some desires are best not left pursued, and by writing this I am in no way saying we should pursue every desire of our hearts. But to live a life where we choose to not pursue something whole and good simply because we are afraid, would be a massive waste. May we never live in regret because of that.*

*The author's views are purely his own, and open to debate. Please do not take every word without careful thinking on your part.*