Today God made me realise something...the very thing that bothered me was the very thing that bothered Him...how many times have I given Him the same reply...."im too busy" or sometimes not even a reply at all...and when I need help its always "God...I need this this this and this....oh yeah...and this too". How ironic....I guess God feels it even more because He created me...I mean...my whole life should be nothing but talking to Him if He wants it....and yet...I don't....and even worse...I sin against Him....as if I'm testing to see if the lightning bolt really will come one day....It's truly a testament of God's Grace that it hasn't come...and when I've done every wrong thing I could....He shows me in camp that I can come home to Him....through a parable that I've knwon almost my entire life....The Prodigal Son....but in a whole new perspective....truly He has been gracious....beyond belief,beyond what I deserve....God...You are amazing...awe-inspiring....and I am sorry for taking so long to realise that You will never forsake me....even when I've turned around and took You for granted...even deliberately going against You, testing Your patience and stretching Your never ending Grace....forgive me....all I can really say is I'm sorry....and thank you...I wish I could say more...so much more...but I just don't have the words....thank you for the awesome redepmtion on that cross....and the awesome encouragement You sent my way...to show me that if I'm ready to change, You are ready to help me....I ask and pray with all my heart that I will not fall into the same pit I fell into....and I ask nothing more than to be able to walk with You all the days of my life....
Thanks You....I'm amazed...
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